Imagine by guest 22 May 2012 at 9:44am
Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Chris Guillebeau of ChrisGuillebeau.com. Imagine a life where all your time is spent on the things you want to do. Imagine giving your greatest attention to a project you create yourself, instead of working as a cog in a machine that exists to make other people rich. [...] The Little Guide to Contentedness by Leo 18 May 2012 at 1:31pm
‘He who is contented is rich.’ ~Lao Tzu Post written by Leo Babauta. There has been little in my life that has made as much an impact as learning to be content — with my life, where I am, what I’m doing, what I have, who I’m with, who I am. This little trick changes [...] The 9-5 Guide to Staying Active by guest 15 May 2012 at 9:00am
Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Matt Madeiro of Make Every Day Count. Let?s see if this rings any bells. When the clock hits 8, I sit. I plop back in my rolling chair, crack open the laptop on my desk, and spend the next nine hours with my butt glued firmly to [...] Three Little Habits to Find Focus by Leo 10 May 2012 at 11:42am
‘Distraction is the only thing that consoles us for miseries and yet it is itself the greatest of our miseries.’ ~Blaise Pascal Post written by Leo Babauta. I’ll be the first to admit that I fall victim to the trap of the Internet — a wonderful empowering tool that can fill your day with distractions, [...] How to Live Well by Leo 7 May 2012 at 1:59pm
‘Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life.’ ~Seneca Post written by Leo Babauta. I’m not a rich man, nor do I fly around the world and drink champagne with famous people in exotic locales, nor do I own a sports car or SUV or a yacht. And yet, [...] What I?ve Learned About Learning by Leo 3 May 2012 at 9:07am
‘We learn more by looking for the answer to a question and not finding it than we do from learning the answer itself.’ ~Lloyd Alexander Post written by Leo Babauta. I am a teacher and an avid learner, and I’m passionate about both. I’m a teacher because I help Eva homeschool our kids — OK, [...] The 39th Lesson by Leo 30 Apr 2012 at 9:05am
Post written by Leo Babauta. Today (April 30) is my 39th Un-un-birthday, and as usual, the day is a good day to pause and reflect. Last year I wrote 38 Life Lessons I?ve Learned in 38 Years, and people seemed to find some use in it. This year, I thought I’d share an additional lesson [...] How to Fail at Habits by Leo 24 Apr 2012 at 11:28am
Post written by Leo Babauta. Before I learned how to change habits, I was stuck. I kept trying to change various habits — running, eating healthier, waking earlier, getting out of debt, ending procrastination — and I kept failing. I got very good at failing, in fact. Looking back on those days, given the power [...] Webinar: How I Used the Power of Bad Habits to Change My Life by Leo 23 Apr 2012 at 8:00am
Post written by Leo Babauta. Yesterday I conducted a free webinar, “How I Used the Power of Bad Habits to Change My Life“, and the video is below. The webinar was held Mon. April 23), and in it I talked about my struggle with bad habits, why bad habits are so powerful, and how I [...] Crazy Talk: The Do-What-You-Love Guide by Leo 19 Apr 2012 at 11:36am
‘Everything you can imagine is real.’ ~Pablo Picasso Post written by Leo Babauta. When I wrote the first words of this blog, more than five years ago, I had no idea those few keystrokes would change my life. I thought I was doing nothing more than reflecting on the changes that had been happening in [...]
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Understanding Jealousy
Here is your Thursday STORY on:
ADAPTING TO CHANGE:
Upon reflection we see many things that we could have done better; however, although we know this to be true we don't take any notice of the message it brings.
Upon reflection implies that in time after an event you can see a better course of action. Why? Because we were more detached from the anguish than that moment had brought us. If only we could introduce that calmness at the time of the torment.
Of course that would be a golden quality should we possess it. But it isn't beyond our reach. We first need to see the advantages of possessing this quality and then make a goal to climb in small steps to achieve it.
Intuition is another sense we often pay no attention to. This sense brings us information that we later regret ignoring. The work here is not to establish a step by step plan to establish a goal, but to let go of other influences that take us away from the guidance our intuition is bringing us.
Today's story draws a parallel with intuition, some guidance is offered and the listener pays no heed to.
THE MOUNTAIN CLIMBER
They tell the story of a mountain climber who, desperate to conquer the Aconcagua, initiated his climb after years of preparation. But he wanted the glory to himself; therefore, he went up alone. He started climbing and it was becoming later, and later. He did not prepare for camping, but decided to keep on going.
Soon it got dark. Night fell with heaviness at a very high altitude. Visibility was zero. Everything was black. There was no moon, and the stars were covered by clouds.
As he was climbing a ridge at about 100 meters from the top, he slipped and fell. Falling rapidly he could only see blotches of darkness that passed. He felt a terrible sensation of being sucked in by gravity. He kept falling... and in those anguishing moment's good and bad memories passed through his mind. He thought certainly he would die.
But then he felt a jolt that almost tore him in half. Yes! Like any good mountain climber he had staked himself with a long rope tied to his waist. In those moments of stillness, suspended in the air he had no other choice but to shout: "HELP ME GOD. HELP ME!"
All of a sudden he heard a deep voice from heaven... "What do you want me to do?"
"SAVE ME."
"Do you REALLY think that I can save you?"
"OF COURSE MY GOD."
"Then cut the rope that is holding you up."
There was another moment of silence and stillness. The man just held tighter to the rope. The rescue team says that the next day they found a frozen mountain climber hanging strongly to a rope...
TWO FEET OFF THE GROUND.
(Unknown Author)
QUOTE: "To find a fault may be easy; to do better may be difficult.'
(Plutarch)
What goes through the mind of a Thug????
I wonder what these people think as they hurt others? For instance I can understand someone like OJ. I understand jealousy and that some people can go into a 'jealous rage'. I can understand someone robbing a bank for drug money or greed.
I can't however understand what goes on in the mind of someone while they are commiting some violent crimes...are these people really no better than animals??? Do they 'think' at all?
Even a simple crime like stealing a potted plant from an old lady's porch....how on earth does someone think of this as something they would want to do and then do it?
I am trying to understand Jealousy?
They say I'm excessively jealous. I don't know if my feelings categorise as jealous or negative. But I couldn't bear to see any one to touch my friend (we're both males). He also felt the same, but probably less then me.
I think it was part of loving him dearly. And for me it was a valid feeling not negative. It was not honoured by my friend who had an accident and allowed someone else to strip him by making me go out from there. I felt so devastated and betrayed I broke the bond.
So what is this feeling really that they call jealousy or possessiveness, but I call love.
It was as if I didn't want any one to come into his sexual space ------ which meant a few inches within his body, especially uncovered body parts, and especially the private parts even if they were covered.
When his legs got fractured I was devastated thinking he might be stripped by the medical staff, especially females. Even the thought of doctors touching his naked leg to put plaster bothered me......
I had never seen him naked myself, and probably could not even hope to do it. All I could have hoped for was some fun together in the dark. When he would pull up his pants to administer medicine on them in front of his female colleague I felt bad. I really wanted to touch his naked leg at that time, but couldn't dare to.
What is this feeling? Why is it there? Is it negative?
I'm myself very very loyal sexually? I take care to protect my body (the sexual parts) from touch of others not only in front of him, but also when he is not there.
Nudity, especially opposite-sex nudity is not common at all in my society, except in westernised hospitals where the nurses are often females. I have hardly seen naked men in my life.
And my friend is extremely handsome. Everyone tried to abuse his sexual space in the hospital because he was so vulnerable.
E.g. one guy kept pushing his hands into his underwear to lift him, when all he needed to do was lift him from the belt. We both objected but he kept doing it. And the female nurse went on to open his zip herself, when in our culture you would ask his male attendant to do it.
Friends I live in a society where sexuality is suppressed, nudity is very rare, and NUDITY = SEX.
And people, including para-medics use social excuses to abuse people's sexual spaces esp. of men since they can't complain.
So for me to have someone see him naked (unles its very important for medical reasons) is to have sex with him.
To see him naked or touch him is the best I could expect in this relationship. That was sex for me. It was my privilege. His viginity of which not being seen naked is a BIG part meant a whole deal to me.
And friends, I can't help feeling bad about others touching him, it doesn't mean I didn't want him to heal. I bore that silently for him.
But I would be very upset that he would be stripped or touched when he didn't have to. E.g., the nurse could have asked me to undress him so she can put the injection. That's only the done thing.
And that if the injection can be given in the arms, then the patient should be allowed to choose. My friend kept insisting that he wants the injection on his arms, but they refused to listen.
What has to be done, has to be done,........ but even the medical fraternity should have scope to accomodate people's feelings.
E.g. allowing people to wear underwear during surgery if they don't need to access that area.
Can I ask the Colts fans a question?
If you were at the divisional game would you have booed that girl? If you were to say yes... well I don't really need to say anything, I mean... we both know what kind of person that makes you. Oh here's something to look at....
http://youtube.com/watch?v=aNYfEa120h0
... it's a new video about that girl. There is a part when the newscaster says "Sometimes people just don't like winners... it's called jealousy." Look at that... even a unbias TV anchor sees and understands jealousy when it's present. Anyway... advice to the Colts fans for the future.... you boo children and your team does not go to the AFC Championship game.
GO PATS!
Actually Chad K. the Patriots have had this ceremony a couple times in the past at playoff games where there were kids wearing Colts jerseys and that kid got as warm a reception as any of the other kids. The fans in the RCA Dome didn't even applaud any of the other kids and then booed that girl. Other fanbases might do it too.... but hey... that makes them just as classless.
Hoosie Daddy: Very CLEVER name by the way. If that story is in fact true... that's horrible, Philly fans are some of the WORST fans out there. Still that doesn't escape the fact that booing a young girl is classless. I'm sorry, pal... you can't defend some bad by making up something worse, even if it is true. If it's bad, it's bad... and speaks volumes for the fanbase.
