Imagine by guest 22 May 2012 at 9:44am
Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Chris Guillebeau of ChrisGuillebeau.com. Imagine a life where all your time is spent on the things you want to do. Imagine giving your greatest attention to a project you create yourself, instead of working as a cog in a machine that exists to make other people rich. [...] The Little Guide to Contentedness by Leo 18 May 2012 at 1:31pm
‘He who is contented is rich.’ ~Lao Tzu Post written by Leo Babauta. There has been little in my life that has made as much an impact as learning to be content — with my life, where I am, what I’m doing, what I have, who I’m with, who I am. This little trick changes [...] The 9-5 Guide to Staying Active by guest 15 May 2012 at 9:00am
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‘Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life.’ ~Seneca Post written by Leo Babauta. I’m not a rich man, nor do I fly around the world and drink champagne with famous people in exotic locales, nor do I own a sports car or SUV or a yacht. And yet, [...] What I?ve Learned About Learning by Leo 3 May 2012 at 9:07am
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‘Everything you can imagine is real.’ ~Pablo Picasso Post written by Leo Babauta. When I wrote the first words of this blog, more than five years ago, I had no idea those few keystrokes would change my life. I thought I was doing nothing more than reflecting on the changes that had been happening in [...]
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Situational Depression
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Here is your Tuesday STORY on:
SELF DEVELOPMENT:
Our mind works in a most peculiar way, and I don't think I need to remind you of that. We can smile at that very contemplation. But why do we allow it to do this?
In WISDOM and PRACTICAL PHILOSOPHY we cannot prevent our mind operating in these peculiar ways, but we can limit it by acknowledging its grip and preventing the turmoil that follows.
You can be assured that our pattern of thought is determined by our state of mind. If we are ever in the mood of revenge, then you can be sure some bizarre thoughts and actions will follow. So bizarre in fact that another time you'll be embarrassed to tell the tale.
Do you ever find yourself justifying your actions?
Consider why you justify? You do it in the hope that your actions will be understood. Why? You hope within your explanation that your actions that now appear wrong can have some sort of good intention. The best explanation of your actions however, is that they were made in a high emotional state.
The justification appears almost as if you are in a court of law. If you find you have to explain your decisions, the very implication is that they were not done from a sound and logical frame of mind.
What is this telling us? That we ARE most definitely controlled by our emotional state of mind. Our good intentions, our sensible head, our intellectual deliberations all mean nothing during the throws of a high emotion. We need our feet firmly on the ground and we need to interrupt by SEEING what is happening, before we can expect any degree of sense to arise from the so called madness that takes over.
Forgive me as I would need to describe this emotional control to an extreme to drive the point home.
Today's story is about a man who looses sight of reality and finds he is making decisions during a period of depression. While ever he stays in this deep and dark emotional state he'll not SEE.
WISDOM is not always about helping yourself. If you practice the skill on other people as did the child in this story, you'll find an understanding that will help direct your own life.
DADDY DEAREST
I laid there in bed, thinking. It had been three years since my dad was lively and happy. A terrible bout with depression was taking a toll on him, and thus our family, over that time span. Lucky for me, I went to college out of town. I came home on breaks, as well as weekends when I could, but I had my own life now. And every time I went home, I would build up walls and keep myself at a distance from all the problems in the family, because I didn't think I could take it. This particular summer, I had arranged for a job near school, so I could escape the emotions of returning to an unhappy home.
As I laid there in my childhood bed, the night before returning to my apartment for the summer, I broke down in tears. How could I be so selfish? How could I leave my mom and dad all alone to deal with this? How could I pretend that I didn't need to bear some of the responsibility of helping out? The years of denial came out in my tears that night, and I knew I couldn't continue on pretending. I was going to help as much as I could, even if that was only a small baby-step.
That next day, I told my dad over breakfast, firmly, that we were going to clean his room, and I was going to help him. My mom had been begging him for a year to clean his room, because it was in such disarray. The doctors said taking proactive steps like that would help him feel better about himself, and maybe chip away at what was wrong with him. But he never wanted to listen. Stubbornly, he never actually took those steps. Much to my surprise, he actually smiled, and said "Ok, " to my suggestion.
That day we went through years of old trash and documents. Newspapers from 10 years ago, computer games from elementary school. We worked together the entire day. All he needed was a firm kick in the butt to get him moving, and then he was able to take charge, looking happier than I had seen in months. By the time the day was over, his room was sparkling. Now we could all go back there and watch television together, just like childhood. though that would unfortunately have to wait until my next visit home. More importantly, now my dad had done something to help himself, and was a little happier. And I had helped him.
It was time to leave though. I had a great job lined up, and had already given up a good night's rest on the first day of work by helping my dad all afternoon. I really hugged my dad as I said goodbye, for the first time in years. And as I hugged my mom goodbye, she whispered "Thank you so much" in my ear. This is still a story in progress, so I can't report that everything is all better now. But my fingers are crossed because now there is a lot more hope, and hope is very powerful.
(Matt Blass, 2002, all rights reserved)
QUOTE: "No lions are ever caught in mousetraps. To catch lions you must think in terms of lions, not in terms of mice. Your mind is always creating traps of one kind or another, and what you catch depends on the thinking you do. It is your thinking that attracts to you what you receive.'
(Thomas Dreier, Author)
[[ct]]: Situational Depression
Situational Depression
6 Jan 2010 at 9:57pm
Depression linked to Finance | Situational Depression
BC Termination Law & Overtime Question?
I am currently going through a bit of trouble with my employer.
I am doing my carpentry apprenticeship I moved me and my family far away from my home town since there was no work. I moved here to get my techincal training in carpentry.
We came here bought a house intended to stay, but it became too hard for my wife, who came here with a 2 yr old and 3 month old. So after being here for a year I went to my employer and told him that I need to move for family reasons, due to lack of family support. They then convinced me to stay around and at least get my techinical training done. I mentioned to them that I would try to take my 3rd and 4th year back to back from Sept- Jan. At the time they were okay with this.
So a year goes by, and I go into 3rd and while in 3rd year I found out that I was accepted into 4th in Novemeber. back to back, so I went to my employer 2 weeks prior to 4th year starting and mentioned I got into 4th year. They said that i could not go. So i also knew that I could get into Jan so I asked them if I could go to Jan 4th year then a month and a bit after the Nov course. The course I had mentioned I would try to take a year ago.
Employer said no. So I ask so when would you allow me to go. They said that I have to fulfill 4 full year of work in order to take my 4th year classes. Which was not what they told me a year ago when I tried to Resign.
So I again explained to them that my wife would not last another year extremely far away from her support system. And told them that they knew about this and were okay with me going when I mentioned it before,. They then all of a sudden said they have a company policy to not allow employees to go back to back. This company policy did not exisit conviently when they so kindly seemed to want to just allow me to get my apprenticeship done. I never signed any contracts, and had a verbal agreement them knowing we needed to move. I also have more than my required hours to take my provincal.
So I said I would have to follow through with my plans and go to school. They at which said that they could not HOLD my job and would have to replace me.
So 4th year came I went, a week into I phone EI since I am in school to find out that my claim had been closed cause me employer sent in a ROE saying that I quit. At which I told EI office that I did not quit and did hopefully plan to work a little after school if they still had a position avaliable for me while I set up plans to move for work elsewhere.
So EI office got incontact with my company and then they put me down as Fired. Although to this day my employer said he didnt persay fire me????
So now I am not getting any income while in school or after while I am trying to set up work and move for work. I have a family of 4 HAD a verbal agreement with my employers that they turned their back on, and they made sure to get my claim messed with.
Also on a side note this whole time employeed with them they have never once paid overtime even though many days Ive worked over 8hours. And over the max regular hours per pay check.
They do pay travel time since some of the time I have to drive a hour to get to job site. But even on days that I did not have to drive out of town, I do not get overtime. is this legal?
Thank You and help is appericated. By the way my wife has Dr's files showing that she has been on antidepressants and axienty med's due to situational depression. I really had no choice but to do this, and had every reason to think my bosses were backing me. As I was friends with them outside of work before all this.
Thanks.
I guess some people would rather answer questions with very little information. I could go around answering mindless questions without any thought myself...but Id rather have more info to go on.
Getting help for depression during pregnancy?
So I've been dealing with situational depression off an on for almost 3 years now. It comes and goes as pleases- only showing when so much stress accumulates then it's there a few days a week for a month or more. So much has to happen in contiguation before it comes up, but then when it does I'm extremely irritible and so easily frustrated its sad. I feel extremely guilty towards my toddler daughter and I cry for hours on end and if I stop something as small as her grabbing a piece of trash out of the garbage can sends me reeling and I really hate myself on these days but I can't really do anything about it. I know I need help and this has been happening for 3 days straight now (it starts with the irritability then everything else piles on unless the stress is alleviated) I'm 28 weeks with my second and I really need to get ahold of myself for my daughter and son to be. I see a midwife. Should I talk to her about it? Can I just call up my normal dr? It's saturday and I really hate to wait till monday to get the prescription and then I can't even get it till friday unless we go into overdraft (finances are a huge part of the stress) and there is only 1 or 2 types I'm willing to take and they cost like $80-100 even with insurance and we make too much money to qualify for anything is there something I don't know about that can help with that expense? I wouldn't even know if I really need it because it will go away for a week to a few months depending again on the stress I hate to get on something and have to rely on it...
Oh and 9 months pp with my first, I was confirmed to have situational depression and was given meds but I couldn't afford it
i am suffering from severe depression and i need advice/help please?
Please read and try to help: I am a 17 year old female suffering from severe depression. All day yesterday i watched movies and then got in a huge fight with my stepdad which caused me to just let all my emotions flow and lose control. I freaked out and cried in my room for about two hours, balling and screaming. i am suffering extreme physiological pain. I ended up leaving to go to McDonald's to try to escape everything and feel better which is what i always do when i get like this. My mom got off work at 2am and i told her that the pain was too much to bear and i needed to go to the hospital or i needed something right now. She told me to wait until morning and we would go to talk to someone. i had an appointment which my mom made about a month ago on December 3rd but i couldn't wait. it is that bad that i have been having suicidal thoughts. i missed school yesterday and today. i went to talk to someone and they said it is clear i have severe depression and i have to hold on till friday dec 3 to talk to someone and get a complete diagnoses and hopefully get medication asap. i just feel so trapped by this pain and everything that i feel like i cant hold on and i know i have to go to school but i hate school! my grades are terrible, i am scared of being social, and i am dealing with truancy and im gonna be in so much trouble for missing so much school! i am pretty sure i have avoidant personality disorder: click here to see what i mean: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_pe? or i have social phobia i believe. I want to have friends and i want to be social and i know i am pretty but i just cant talk to people or carry out a conversation and i dont understand why. My grades are terrible and i am in a deep hole that i feel like i cant escape. my family has no money. i have 6 brothers and sisters who i have to babysit almost every night and it kills me not being socially accepted. Me and my stepdad get into very heated arguments and they are terrible and make it a terror to even be home. but i am not going to kill myself because i have to be here for my siblings and my mom who is working so hard to support us. i feel so trapped! what do i do? what can i do to pass the time or escape this feeling!? i feel like i have absolutely nobody to talk to! Someone at least PRAY FOR ME! or help me in anyway possible PLEASE!! i feel like God isn't here for me right now!
Additional Details
I do not believe it is situational depression but maybe something much deeper. I have always been depressed it gets better and worse but its always there i just didn't know what it was or tat things could get better. i took 50 adult aspirin when i was in 7th grade trying to commit suicide and i wish more than anything my mom would taken me to get medication earlier and talk to someone and my life would maybe be so much better. :/ i am scared that i am gonna be unhappy forever and never be able to go to college because i already ruined my GPA and i have no money! its like pointless!
