Self Help

Here is your Sunday STORY on: THE LOVE OF WISDOM: I search through every conceivable source to bring these stories on a daily basis. Often these moments do not necessarily come from the highest source, spiritual, godliness or most academic in their field of study, but they maybe from children or a close colleague. Today's story is about arguing within the family and one way in which to prevent it from escalating. WHO IS TO BLAME? I was listening with close attention to a lady colleague of mine who was trying to resolve a marital problem. Separation had occurred and bitterness had set in. Both partners were living separately, but whenever a solution to a problem was required, both partners needed to talk and try to resolve the issue. What ensued was an argument, where both parties disagreed. Tempers flared and the encounter was discontinued. Matrimonial problems are not easy, and as I listened attentively to every too and fro of the most recent communicative disasters, there was one comment that was made that I shall remember for the rest of my life. She told me she had gone for matrimonial help, but before she took the first hurdle she was advised to try an open discussion once more with her ex-husband, in her own home. However the mediator, in this case a lady solicitor (lawyers/attorney), suggested she needed to keep one thing clear in her mind, 'DO NOT LAY BLAME, ' otherwise an argument will result. Having studied that for a moment, I thought wow! Isn't that just so true. Laying blame infuriates your opposite partner and a verbal slanging match begins. As much as you are tempted with the impulse to lay blame, you need to resist. I tend to govern my life with, authoritative comments, short quotes, short stories, parables and philosophy from all corners of the globe. So it would seem appropriate to add, 'Don't Lay Blame' to my own personal philosophy. Of course we know that this statement is true, but if we are prompted with a few words of wisdom the whole subject floods into mind and our actions are justly affected. 'Don't Lay Blame, ' wow! (Phil Booker) I have recently watched a film based upon a book, the film was called 'Pollyana.' It is a beautiful story of a young English girl who lost both her parents when she was only about twelve years old and had to stay with her auntie. Her auntie wasn't the most enjoyable family member to be alone with. She could hardly raise a smile. But Pollyana remembered fondly her father, who always was an optimist. Whatever was to happen, especially negatives, he would teach Pollyana to see the positive and smile even during the darkest moments. A superb plot that eventually had Pollyana responsible for changing the image of this sleepy village into a vibrant, enthusiastic and giving community. QUOTE: "An optimist sees an opportunity in every calamity; a pessimist sees a calamity in every opportunity. (Sir Winston Churchill, former British Prime Minister).

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