Enjoy Being Single

Eastern Wisdom

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The Pause Upon Which All Else Relies
by Leo
9 Feb 2012 at 8:56am
Post written by Leo Babauta. There is one little habit I’ve learned that has changed everything else in my life. The pause. When we fail, it’s because we act on urges without thinking, without realizing it. We have the urge to eat junk, and we do it. We have the urge to check email instead [...]
The Thousand Cuts Fitness Program
by Leo
6 Feb 2012 at 10:43am
Post written by Leo Babauta. I’ve trained for marathons, triathlons, 10Ks, a 13.5-hour challenge, Ubanathlons, and more. But my favorite fitness program isn’t one where you train for a major event. It’s where you get fit by a thousand little actions. When the actions are tiny, they are easy. You have no excuse. You can [...]
The Two-Headed Beast of Successful Habit Change
by guest
2 Feb 2012 at 9:20am
Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Tyler Tervooren of Advanced Riskology. I used to have a lot of bad habits. I still do, but I used to have a lot more. Here?s just a small sampling: I woke up late and went to bed early. I procrastinated on my most important work. I [...]
Create the Habit of Meditation, & the Zen Habits Premium Membership
by Leo
31 Jan 2012 at 3:03pm
Post written by Leo Babauta. It’s something I should have created a long time ago: the Zen Habits Premium Membership, and a mini-course that’s included with it called Create the Habit of Meditation. The membership is a monthly subscription of $19.99, but really it’s a commitment to changing your life, and the tools needed to [...]
Creating Silence from Chaos
by Leo
27 Jan 2012 at 3:20pm
Post written by Leo Babauta. We are often afraid of silence, because its emptiness feels idle, boring, unproductive, and scary. And so we fill our lives with chaos, noise, clutter. But silence can be lovely, and therapeutic, and powerful. It can be the remedy for our stress and the habits that crush us. If we [...]
The Habits That Crush Us
by Leo
23 Jan 2012 at 11:26am
‘Don’t panic.’ ~Douglas Adams Post written by Leo Babauta. Why is it that we cannot break the bad habits that stand in our way, crushing our desires to live a healthy life, be fit, simplify, be happier? How is it that our best intentions are nearly always beaten? We want to be focused and productive, [...]
Learning to Sit Alone, in a Quiet Empty Room
by Leo
17 Jan 2012 at 1:49pm
‘All men’s miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone.’ ~Blaise Pascal Post written by Leo Babauta. Think about some of the problems of our daily lives, and how many of them would be eased if we could learn to sit alone, in a quiet empty room, with contentment. If [...]
Life as a Conscious Practice
by Leo
13 Jan 2012 at 9:15am
‘Everything is practice.’ ~Pele Post written by Leo Babauta. When we learn a martial art, or ballet, or gymnastics, or soccer ? we consciously practice movements in a deliberate way, repeatedly. By conscious, repeated practice, we become good at those movements. Our entire lives are like this, but we’re often less conscious of the practice. [...]
Your Top 10 Clutter Questions, Answered
by Leo
11 Jan 2012 at 11:33am
Post written by Leo Babauta. Decluttering is a skill that you learn with practice, just like any skill. And just like other skills, there are many little questions and problems you need answered and solved as you get started. Those of you taking the Clutterfat Challenge this month are facing these problems, and I’m here [...]
Clearing Your Life for a New Year
by Leo
9 Jan 2012 at 12:55pm
Post written by Leo Babauta. Every January, people rush out and get a gym membership, set a list of goals or resolutions, and get ready to take on a new year of frenetic activity. Unfortunately, we don’t often clear space to make room for all this new stuff. The beginning of the year is a [...]


Enjoy Being Single

Here is your Thursday STORY on: ADAPTING TO CHANGE: Often the big fear with CHANGE is the position it leaves you in. It may result in your respect being lost, your house, your job or your standing in the community. If we put too much of a value on these, then the change is feared most. At the end of the day these do have value, but what about your health, your smile and all the other values? We can often forget that in reality our health has more priority than our house. If we lose our house, we haven't lost our health, our depth of character, our smile, our honesty and our integrity. We can always get another house, but we can't always get our health fully back to its original state. Rather than see a change as the end, the sorrowful and pitiful, the miserable and frustrating; and ultimately wallow in this sadness and wonder what to do. We should realise that with every end there is a new beginning. We should forget all the pity, forget all the need for consolation and allow this period of sadness to end too. We should SEE a chance to start again, start over. What better position can we be in, if we've experienced the troubles that has caused an ENDING, we'll be aware of the pitfalls and avoid them in our new beginning. Sometimes as we stay with the moral high ground and find we suffer as a consequence, is it not the case that we're obviously putting too much value in the sufferance? If you stick with your good morals and for some reason you go down one rung of the ladder, why have you suffered? You haven't suffered, what you have done is chose to give value to the subject that's taken you down the rung of the ladder. It may have been the house you lost, when you should have considered that although the house has gone your health and fit mind remains intact. More often than not it isn't what happens in life that is the problem it is how we perceive it upon our lifestyle. If we adjust our view, we can get back on track. Today's story is the perfect illustration of keeping the moral high ground and at first thinking you've suffered a loss; but with due consideration the values had been wrong until you'd reconsidered. WHAT GOOD IS INTEGRITY? After a workshop, Paul (that's not his real name) said that he still has 10-year-old scars from the time he quit a good job rather than lie. When his boss asked him to issue a press release containing patently false statements, he refused, putting his employee badge on the table. His boss calmly handed the badge back to him saying, "Think this over. Why throw away a good job and a promising career?" Paul walked out so frustrated and frightened, he had to find a private place to cry. What's worse, he said that his act of moral courage was a meaningless waste. Someone else issued the press release and his boss's career flourished. "It took me years to find a job as good as that one and my family suffered, " he added. "So, what good did my integrity do for anyone?" Paul was looking for validation of his principled stance in the wrong places. We exercise integrity not to get what we want, but to be what we want. Integrity is not essentially about winning; it's about staying whole and being worthy of self-respect and the esteem of loved ones. It's about being honourable, not as a success strategy, but a life choice. Though Paul suffered for a time because of his moral courage, he would have suffered far worse had he betrayed his own values. While he didn't appreciate it, Paul preserved for himself and his family something far more valuable than his job -- his honour. And it's no accident that he now has a better job with no pressures to cheat or lie. (Michael Josephson, Speaker and Radio Commentator) QUOTE: 'It is not financial wealth one asks for, but just enough to preserve one's dignity, to work unhampered, to be generous, frank and independent.' (W. Somerset Maugham, 'Of Human Bondage', 1915)


Break ups? Any advice?
I posted the story of this break up earlier... Now I'm just wondering what I should do? I've been talking to some of my best friends who are guys and the both like me though. I don't think I want another relationship since my 9 month one just ended today. I'm sad slash happy about it though,..because it caused a lot of stress..but te 2 guys I'm talking to are close to my ex...one asked to Hang out not a date but I don't know if they'd take it like that? I really don't feel sorry for my ex cause he really pisssed me off. I don't know if I want to start another relationship though..should I flirt and enjoy being single? Or find a new guy? Or get to know one of the 2 guys? One I actually kinda like, the other is just like a brother.

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Should I date him or not?
My band recently took a trip to Hawaii. I'm pretty new to the school so I didn't really know anyone but I got a lot closer to everyone including this guy. We've talked non stop since coming back home and I really like him and it's extremely obvious that he likes me. We've talked about dating a few times, and this is where I'm stuck. I really like him, but I've never dated before so I'm nervous. I'm also a huge flirt- I hang out with guys all the time. I don't mean to be so bad, it's just who I am and I don't want him to think something false and get hurt. I also really enjoy being single and being able to look at guys, but a big part of me really wants to go out with him. He's the sweetest person in the world. What should I do?

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i have some boy problems..help? /:?
Okay so i recently broke up with my boyfriend (Todd) because there was this romour that he was cheating on me. I'm only in middle school. So i know the relationships are just for fun. Well, after i broke up with him my best guy friend started to like me he asked me out & i said no. I still have feelings for my ex and he deffantly has feeling for me. My ex told me he's obssesed with me and that kinda creeped me out. i know i hurt him a lot and i feel so bad. I do belive he didn't cheat on me but there was so much drama! & now Jake iss making a big deal because someone told him i like him. i told him to give it time to see if i could have feelings for him, but i dont. So now theres too boy and i feell horrible. I love to go to out and flirt & get new boys numbers. but i can't do it if im in a relationship. I enjoy being single because i have a big burden off of me. It's like I'm afraid that if i don't get back together with Todd i'll never get to hug him again, or talk to him.& if i say no to Jake i'll never have him as a bestfriend. Should i pick on, if so which one? Todd was very clinquey & jake is getting there. I don't want to hurt anyone or loos anything. i've tried to avoid this but its getting hard. SHould i stay single. WHAT DO I DO?!!

Get the answers...

Individual Therapy : How to Enjoy Being Single

15 Nov 2008 at 12:13pm


REAL TALK: ENJOY BEING SINGLE

16 Nov 2011 at 3:54am


How to Enjoy Being Single On Valentine's Day!

12 Feb 2009 at 6:40am



Next page: Intimacy


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